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Mooseboy Alfonzo and His Prairie Troubadours

Bootylicious

Bootylicious

Released 2005


Whenever people learn about my hobby, they always seem to find this song particularly interesting. I suppose it's the whole "middle-aged white guy sings Destiny's Child" thing, but one of the points behind all this is the sheer incredulousnessosity of these opuses. I'm the last guy you'd expect to sing "Bootylicious", but once you've heard it, you'll say "he's the last guy I'd expect to sing "Bootylicious."

Bootylicious <--Click here to listen

Download the .mp3

Download a .zip archive of the .mp3

Behind the Scenes

  • Opus number 8
  • Instruments played - None
  • My daughter's instruments - Marimba
  • Samples used - None
  • Features Chuck D-bot, Squeaky, and Comp
Mooseboy's Lyrics (color-coded) Original Lyrics
Mooseboy, can you handle this?
Yeah Mooseboy, can you handle this?
I'm the Mooseboy and I can handle this?
I don't think they can handle this!
(Whoo!)

Barely move, we've arrived
Lookin sexy, lookin fly
Baddest chick, chick inside
DJ, jam tonight
Spotted me a tender thang
There you are, come on baby
Don't you wanna dance with me
Can you handle, handle me

You know you gotta do much better
If you gonna dance with me tonight
You gotta work out all that jelly
If you gonna dance with me tonight
Read my lips carefully if you like what you see
Move, groove, prove you can hang with me
By the looks I got you shook up and scared of me
Hook up your seatbelt, it's time for takeoff

I don't think you're ready for this jelly
I don't think you're ready for this jelly
I don't think you're ready for this
My body's too bootylicious for ya babe

I don't think you're ready for this jelly
I don't think you're ready for this jelly
I don't think you're ready for this
My body's too bootylicious for ya babe

Baby, can you handle this?
Baby, can you handle this?
Baby, can you handle this?
I don't think you can handle this!
(Whoo!)

I'm about to break you off
H-town goin hard
Lead my hips, slap my thighs
Swing my hair, square my eyes
Lookin hot, smellin' good
Groovin like I'm from the hood
Over my shoulder, I blow you a kiss
Can you handle, handle this

I don't think you're ready for this jelly
I don't think you're ready for this jelly
I don't think you're ready for this
My body's too bootylicious for ya babe

I don't think you're ready for this jelly
I don't think you're ready for this jelly
I don't think you're ready for this
My body's too bootylicious for ya babe

Move your body up and down (whoo!)
Make your booty touch the ground (whoo!)
I can't help but wonder why
Is my vibe too vibealicious for you, babe

I shake my jelly at every chance
When I whip with my hips you slip in a trance
I'm hoping you can handle all this jelly that I have
Now let's cut a rug while we scat some jazz

Shoo-be-do, do-be-do, wahh-wahh, do-be-do
Yeah, yeah
Scooby-do-wah-boo-yeah, baby
I really dig it

I don't think you're ready for this jelly
I don't think you're ready for this jelly
I don't think you're ready for this
My body's too bootylicious for ya babe

I don't think you're ready for this jelly
I don't think you're ready for this jelly
I don't think you're ready for this
My body's too bootylicious for ya babe

(You are not ready
What is that?
Melba toast?
You are certainly not ready)
My body's too bootylicious for ya babe

(Shoo-be-do, wahh-wahh, do-be-do, yeah, yeah
Scooby-do-wah-boo-yeah, baby)
My body's too bootylicious for ya babe

(You should try Wonder Bread or Ritz Crackers
You white bread honky cracker)
My body's too bootylicious for ya babe

I don't think you're ready for this jelly
I don't think you're ready for this jelly
I don't think you're ready for this
My body's too bootylicious for ya babe
(Whoo!)
Kelly, can you handle this?
Michelle, can you handle this?
Beyonce, can you handle this?
I don't think they can handle this
(Whoo!)

Better move, 'cause we've arrived
Lookin' sexy, lookin' fly
Baddest chick, chick inside
DJ, jam tonight

Spotted me, a tender thang
There you are, come on baby
Don't you wanna dance with me?
Can you handle, handle me?

You gotta do much better
If you're gonna dance with me tonight
You gotta work your jelly
If you're gonna dance with me tonight

Read my lips carefully, if you like what you see
Move, groove, prove you can hang with me
By the looks I got you shook up and scared of me
Buckle your seatbelt, it's time for takeoff

I don't think you're ready for this jelly
I don't think you're ready for this jelly
I don't think you're ready for this
My body's too bootylicious for ya babe

I don't think you're ready for this jelly
I don't think you're ready for this jelly
I don't think you're ready for this
My body's too bootylicious for ya babe

Baby can you handle this?
Baby can you handle this?
Baby can you handle this?
I don't think you can handle this
(Whoo!)

I'm about to break you off
H-town goin' hard, read my hips
Slap my thighs, swing my hair
Square my eyes
Lookin' hot, smellin' good
Groovin' like I'm from the hood
Over my shoulder I blow you a kiss
Can you handle, handle this?

I don't think you're ready for this jelly
I don't think you're ready for this jelly
I don't think you're ready for this
My body's too bootylicious for ya babe

I don't think you're ready for this jelly
I don't think you're ready for this jelly
I don't think you're ready for this
My body's too bootylicious for ya babe

Move your body up and down (whoo)
Make your booty touch the ground (whoo)
I can't help but wonder why (whoo)
My vibe's too vibealacious for you babe

I shake my jelly at every chance
When I whip with my hips you slip into a trance
I'm hoping you can handle all this jelly that I have
Now let's cut a rug while we scat some jazz

[scatting]

I don't think you're ready for this jelly
I don't think you're ready for this jelly
I don't think you're ready for this
My body's too bootylicious for ya babe

I don't think you're ready for this jelly
I don't think you're ready for this jelly
I don't think you're ready for this
My body's too bootylicious for ya babe

I don't think you're ready for this jelly
I don't think you're ready for this jelly
I don't think you're ready for this
My body's too bootylicious for ya babe

I don't think you're ready for this jelly
I don't think you're ready for this jelly
I don't think you're ready for this
My body's too bootylicious for ya babe

I don't think you're ready for this jelly
I don't think you're ready for this jelly (I don't think you're ready)
I don't think you're ready for this
My body's too bootylicious for ya babe

I don't think you're ready for this jelly
I don't think you're ready for this jelly
I don't think you're ready for this
My body's too bootylicious for ya baby


http://www.the-mooseboy.com